She had agonized over it for weeks. Believe me, the bitterness of it has almost departed, crushed out of me together with much of the weariness and sorrow I brought with me here by the nameless glory of these lonely months. I've destroyed my only chance. Little by little, she stopped hating him. It may bring us together again. His number was unlisted and unpublished. She wanted to think of him as her beloved person, to be near him and watch him, to have him going about, doing this and that, saying this and that, unconscious of her, while she too remained unconscious of herself. I shall have to discover one suitable.
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